Safe Side Of The Ropes

By: Andrew Harrison

Nov 09 2010

Category: Uncategorized

2 Comments

“Every great magic trick consists of three acts. The first act is called The Pledge. The magician shows you something ordinary, but of course, it probably isn’t.”

Audley Hugh Harrison probably over-egged the pudding in act one. He’s been showing the audience something ordinary for the best part of a decade, ever since he returned from Sydney a national hero with an Olympic gold medal hanging from his neck. These were heady times indeed for the British heavyweight. Lennox Lewis presided over the professional ranks and with Audley championing the vest and headguard brigade simultaneously, the pesky “horizontal” tag which had been appended to the best of our big ‘uns for more than a century, finally looked to be heading for the recycling box.

The BBC jumped all over Audley. Physically gifted, obviously talented and with oodles of personality, they threw a major chunk of their licensing bounty at the big man, inking him to a ten fight deal. Four million viewers tuned in to watch Harrison’s debut on terrestrial television, hoping to bond with him on his journey towards the heavyweight crown. In return they received (in a primetime viewing slot no less) the type of repulsive mismatch win (over ham-and-egger Mike Middleton) which usually accompanies the maiden voyages of potential stars.

Aunty continued to pass off “Harrison against TBA” as mainstream entertainment, short-sighted planning which heaped nothing but scorn and derision upon both their venture and the fighter himself. And, after seventeen straight wins, they pulled the plug. Harrison maintains that it was a decision based on his refusal to wrap up his fledgling promotional company, A-Force Promotions, rather than the scathing press clippings his performances were generating in droves.

Relocation to the States brought another brace of wins, before he returned home to settle a score with domestic rival Danny Williams, at which point things imploded. In front of a mammoth ITV audience the sport took a very public shellacking, with Williams and Harrison combining to produce a bout so poor, stocks in fumigation companies spiked across the capital. “Fraudley” was born into the world, soon to be followed by “A-Farce” and “Audinery”. Oh what a field day the tabloid hacks had with their punning. After an ambitious comeback against the highly rated Dominic Guinn ended in defeat also, Harrison’s career went into freefall.

The brief spark which ignited from a spirited revenge win over Williams was quickly doused by the left hand of Michael Sprott, the Reading man rising from the canvas to poleaxe Audley in three. Irishman Martin Rogan outworked our beloved dreamer the following year. If he wasn’t ordinary, it was incredible sleight of hand.

“The second act is called The Turn. The magician makes this ordinary something do something extraordinary. Now you’re looking for the secret, but you won’t find it.”

Prizefighter. Barry Hearn’s creative touch applied to a sport in dire need of ideas. In an eight man heavyweight tournament in London, Harrison, fighting like a man trying to find the bathroom at night, all wide eyed with his arm stretched out in front of him, stumbled across a neat trick. With his ordinary guise now well established, all he had to do was play along, look timid, devoid of ideas and unable to throw punches and then, once he’d lulled his opponent into a false sense of security…. SHAZAM…he smashed them in the chops with his excellent left. Novices Scott Belshaw, Danny Hughes and Coleman Barrett all fell before him and the dream was alive once more.

But that wasn’t the end of the show.

Adapting his trick over the twelve round distance, Harrison played his ordinary role to perfection for eleven and a half rounds against former conqueror Sprott. Behind on the cards and with the clock ticking down in the final session, Harrison pulled back from the precipice and uncorked a huge left hand……BLAMMO……Sprott fell like a brick to be counted out and just like that, Harrison was the European heavyweight champion. Now he had a bargaining chip.

“That’s why there’s a third act called, The Prestige. It’s the part with the twists and turns, where lives hang in the balance, and you see something shocking you’ve never seen before.”

Now for the sucker punch. As Harrison prepares to do battle with former friend and sparring partner David Haye for a world heavyweight title he’s long coveted, the broadcaster who pushed so hard to bring the match to fruition would have you believe that Harrison is poised to perform his ultimate rendition. They’d like you to fork out £14.95 to see this magical feat, one conjured with a left hand that has been plastered all over the build-up, the same mitt which a minority of insiders are tipping him to knock Haye senseless with. They’re even offering it to you in 3D (hey it worked for Avatar right?).

And here’s the twist.

The fight is a mismatch. At 30, David Haye has compiled a 24-1 (22) record, one marked by a willingness to take risks and shoot for the moon. After overconfidence brought him down to earth in his eleventh contest at cruiserweight, he regrouped to take European and world honours, halting Jean Marc Mormeck in a Parisian suburb in 2007.

After demolishing domestic rival Enzo Maccarinelli the following year he invaded boxing’s big league in pursuit of the ultimate prize, the heavyweight championship. After an exciting debut win at his poundage over journeyman Monte Barrett, Haye outfoxed the leviathan Nikolay Valuev in Nuremberg to take an alphabet world title. He followed that one up by chopping down the plenty game John Ruiz in Manchester, flattening the sturdy Massachussets man four times throughout the nine rounds it spanned.

A media darling after the Valuev win, Haye’s public image has taken a beating since. After appearing to baulk at repeated offers to face one of the Klitschko brood (the younger of which, Wladimir, is the true heavyweight champion), Haye’s promises to remove the Ukrainians from office have been seen as whistling in the dark. There are those who remain sceptical over his true intentions; heavyweight saviour or simple con artist? Who exactly is fooling who in this whole thing? Haye and Booth? Harrison? Sky?

He’s also set himself up as the bully in this encounter, a move which has seen public support flip flop over to the underdog in Harrison.

Bad eggs don’t make for bad fighters of course. Haye has established himself as arguably the hardest puncher in the sport, a quick, clever boxer with an uncanny knack of landing a shot his opponent doesn’t see. Only Belgian Ismael Abdoul has managed to share ring time with Haye and not had his senses scrambled at some point, more as a result of Haye looking to navigate the twelve round distance in  public for the first time. He is a ferocious hitter.

Harrison 27-4 (20), is a decent man and has shown as much in the pre-fight coverage. His interviews have been entertaining, inspirational even, whilst his dreams of fulfilling a personal quest and finding redemption along the way seem to have struck a chord with supporters as themes worth investment. Huge at 6’ 5 ½” and 18 stone, Audley has excellent technical ability and one punch stopping power in his southpaw left. His problems lie elsewhere.

At 39, Harrison is an old fighter, one that has often shown an aversion to the dirty business of fighting. He can look startled when an opponent gets close to him and even less enthusiastic when required to throw punches himself. Despite boasting that he’ll get in Haye’s face and provide “The Hayemaker” with the hardest fight of his life, he’s never once shown the ability to do such a thing.

Haye is a destroyer. He’ll go for Harrison from the opening bell and won’t stop until he’s bludgeoned him to a sickening defeat. I’d be amazed if the bout lasted three rounds.

Haye is a prohibitive favourite at 1/6, with Audley somewhere close to a 6/1 underdog. Haye by knockout is a paltry 1/3, so I’d suggest taking him to win in the bout’s first quarter at 11/4.